Despite modernity, many people in Africa today still desire a marriage which reflects on their heritage. The Bahima people of Ankore kingdom fit snugly into this description. The marriage traditions in Ankore are surrounded with cultural norms and tales that make it different from other sub cultures in the Ugandan context. Lets hear it from Prince John Barigye himself, the uncrowned king of Ankole, written (Ankore), as he explains the kingdom’s marriage traditions.
The Bride's give-away ceremony, called Okuhingira in Runyankore.
"First the groom's family would send an emissary to deliver the 'tough' message to the bride's family. This messenger was known as Kyebembera or Kateerarume,... It had to be someone fond to both families. If the message was received well, the boy's family would deposit some cows at the girl's home to ensure that no other prospecting suitor takes her.
On taking the cows home, there would be a small function of 'eating for the cows' (okurira ente). The bride's sister would light a small fire for the cows [added: okuhembera] - cows like fire since it keeps away flies and ticks. There would be recital of poems, called Ebyevugo. It was after that, that a date for the give-away ceremony, called Okuhingira, would be set.
"The give-away was the last festival- the actual marriage, after which the couple would be husband and wife. The bride would get several gifts from her family, to start her off in her new home; it was the duty of the girl's father to get these items."The most important gift was the omugamba -a form of stick on which several cultural gifts could be suspended. And on this would be milk vessels (ebyanzi). The number of vessels would normally correspond with the cows that were given to the bride's family. There would also be a watering can [added:icuba/akarobo], some beauty ointment, a clay pot[ekicunga], one for perfume, another for water.
The Bride's give-away ceremony, called Okuhingira in Runyankore.
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| John Barigye |
"These cows were known as Enkwatarugo (or literary "cows to keep the kraal").
This is an ancient custom with Abahima or Bahima traditions.After this, both families would start negotiations on the bride price. On reaching an agreement, the bride's family would choose the date on which to pick their cows agreed upon. On that day, the bride's people would go and hand pick the best cows from the groom's or his family's herd. However, Out of fear of loosing their best, some families would hide the healthiest cows, although if the girl's people were smarter, they would have sent spies earlier, to identify the best cows.
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| Omugamba Ebyanzi |
"The give-away was the last festival- the actual marriage, after which the couple would be husband and wife. The bride would get several gifts from her family, to start her off in her new home; it was the duty of the girl's father to get these items."The most important gift was the omugamba -a form of stick on which several cultural gifts could be suspended. And on this would be milk vessels (ebyanzi). The number of vessels would normally correspond with the cows that were given to the bride's family. There would also be a watering can [added:icuba/akarobo], some beauty ointment, a clay pot[ekicunga], one for perfume, another for water.
Poems would be recited by the groom's relatives in gratitude, followed by speeches and feasting. Some parents could choose to return a few cows to the couple. The bride would leave the following morning, with a number of escorts, among them her paternal aunt to teach her some things about marriage. And if the bride was a virgin, the aunt would return with a bull.
In the original context, there would be no prior meetings between the bride and the groom.The groom would visit the family, bearing gifts to establish friendship (okugamba obugyenyi). But the girl's family would use delay tactics and generally make it a little harder, especially if they were wealthy.The groom would deposit some cows to keep rivals at bay.
"History is full of examples where the deposit was over rode by someone else, the men were always competing, the powerful had more cattle,".
A father in law of integrity would say no to the second competitor, but the world doesn't have many of such people anymore.Then it would be time to agree on how many cows to pay as bride price. The number of cows given depended on the wealth of the groom's family.
For example, when the Prince of Igara (a county in east Ankole) Rwakibogo was marrying Magwende, the sister of Ntare, the fifth king of Ankole, he gave 1,000 head of cattle. That was around 1880. Because this was a marriage between two wealthy families, their son, Kesironi Karututu is the only known Munyankole, who has owned 10,000 heads of cattle in the 20th century.
On settling the number of cows, a date would be set to pick the cows and on that day, a team from the bride's family would go and choose from the herd. There would be no festivities; it was a sad time for the groom's family, which was loosing cows. Afterwards a date for the give-away ceremony (okuhingira) would be set.
On the D-day, the groom would come with his people, including poets who would chant, as the festivities got warmer. Every Muhiima boy was supposed to have a poem, about a topic of his interest. These poems were delivered in a rapid, musical style. At this ceremony, the bride's father would give the couple gifts. The gifts would include:
A yoke (omugamba). This was a pole, on which they would tie things to transport. The yoke would have milk vessels (ebyanzi) made of wood, a wooden pail used for watering cows (eicuba).
Huge gourds for storing milk and churning butter (ebishaabo n'ebirere) and brushes for cattle made out of sisal (enkuyo).
A yoke (omugamba). This was a pole, on which they would tie things to transport. The yoke would have milk vessels (ebyanzi) made of wood, a wooden pail used for watering cows (eicuba).
Huge gourds for storing milk and churning butter (ebishaabo n'ebirere) and brushes for cattle made out of sisal (enkuyo).
An urn for water and several other pots for perfume, and another to fumigate the milk vessels.
A huge basket-like item (ekigagara) on which they would drape items like bark cloth and animal skins for perfuming by placing burning essence under it.
The next morning would be a moment of sadness; the girl would be cry as she left her family, escorted by close relatives but the main escort would be her paternal aunt (eishenkazi).
The journey to the groom’s home would start in the morning. On arrival, the first ritual was of the bride sitting on the father-in-law's laps. This meant she was his wife too; after all, the cows that brought her in were his. The following day the bride's relatives would go home, save for the aunt who would stay behind for about four days to give the girl some tips on sex and marriage. Some people would come to pick the aunt (okwiha amuhanda). She would be given a bull if the girl was a virgin.
A huge basket-like item (ekigagara) on which they would drape items like bark cloth and animal skins for perfuming by placing burning essence under it.
The next morning would be a moment of sadness; the girl would be cry as she left her family, escorted by close relatives but the main escort would be her paternal aunt (eishenkazi).
The journey to the groom’s home would start in the morning. On arrival, the first ritual was of the bride sitting on the father-in-law's laps. This meant she was his wife too; after all, the cows that brought her in were his. The following day the bride's relatives would go home, save for the aunt who would stay behind for about four days to give the girl some tips on sex and marriage. Some people would come to pick the aunt (okwiha amuhanda). She would be given a bull if the girl was a virgin.
About three months after the wedding, the couple would go to visit the bride's family (okutatsya ekihara). This visit would be characterised by lavish entertainments and if the girl was already pregnant, the better. At the end of the visit, they would be given a cow to take home with them and this was the last custom.
For the modern Munyankole girl, getting married is no longer as lengthy as it used to be. Ms Carol Kanyoonza Rutega is the general manager of Executive Events, an event managing company in Kampala. She married Mr Simon Rutega in 1996. Obviously, she and her husband-to-be had already met, courted and agreed to marry. Then a messenger went to her home. Her family agreed and they fixed the date for the introduction ceremony. This has been adopted from the Baganda way of marriage.
After that, it was the occasion of going for cows (okujuga).
After that, it was the occasion of going for cows (okujuga).
"My brothers and cousins went to the man's home and actually chose the cows." But she would not reveal how many her family got. When the cows arrived, there was another celebration - of bringing the cows (okureeta ente).
Preparations for the give-away got underway. "I sent out invitation cards, to friends and relatives," says Rutega. On that day, the groom and his people arrived - the important guests of the day. When the guests sat, the bride came out of the house, accompanied by her sisters and friends. They were all covered. The bride's face is not supposed to be seen, and Rutega stuck to that old rule.In her give-away gifts was the omugamba. Her’s had milk vessels, gourds, clay pots, brushes and a few household items and were mostly given by her father. And like Rutega, modern couples go through only three steps - the introduction, the give-away and the church wedding. Today, the mobile phone has made it easier, as families can conclude negotiations over the phone. And most grooms would rather pay a cash equivalent of cows. But one thing strongly remains, and it featured in all the three give away ceremonies of Museveni's daughters. That is the omugamba. Also, depending on the wealth of the bride's father, there can be washing machines, sideboards, fridges, cookers, and beddings.
Preparations for the give-away got underway. "I sent out invitation cards, to friends and relatives," says Rutega. On that day, the groom and his people arrived - the important guests of the day. When the guests sat, the bride came out of the house, accompanied by her sisters and friends. They were all covered. The bride's face is not supposed to be seen, and Rutega stuck to that old rule.In her give-away gifts was the omugamba. Her’s had milk vessels, gourds, clay pots, brushes and a few household items and were mostly given by her father. And like Rutega, modern couples go through only three steps - the introduction, the give-away and the church wedding. Today, the mobile phone has made it easier, as families can conclude negotiations over the phone. And most grooms would rather pay a cash equivalent of cows. But one thing strongly remains, and it featured in all the three give away ceremonies of Museveni's daughters. That is the omugamba. Also, depending on the wealth of the bride's father, there can be washing machines, sideboards, fridges, cookers, and beddings.
[This story was adapted, [and refined by me] from Sunday Monitor Lifestyle May 22 - 28, 2005]
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